The XYZBot Rubber Band Machine Gun Will Defend Your Cubicle


Sometimes, in the course of human events, it is necessary to go to war with your co-workers. And that requires rubber band guns. But some of us don’t believe in just one lone rubber band to defend us. We believe in weapons supremacy. We believe in electric motors! We will not tolerate a rubber band gap!

Fortunately, XYZBot has our backs with a rubber band machine gun.

Spray And Pray

Needless to say, this isn’t your typical rubber band gun. And, you’ll have to be handy to get this; it doesn’t come pre-assembled and you’ll need to put it together yourself. But, however, it’s well worth it. It’s got a revolving barrel, first of all, although it’s not the only one with that advantage on the market. It uses an electric motor and batteries to spin the barrel and unload at 800 rounds per minute.

Band Of Rubber

Another nice touch is that it’s laser-cut entirely from wood and engraved with decoration as well. A handy front end handle allows you to steady it, although it’s light enough that you can go one-handed if you’re strong enough. Or, if you’re particularly bad-ass, you can get two and go guns akimbo to take out co-workers, small children, pets, and probably any hope of a career at your current place of work.

Guns Akimbo


Wooden weapons are, of course, all the rage in coworker warfare, and you probably can’t stand to have any sort of disadvantage when Bob from Accounting inevitably attempts to invade from his beachhead on the eighth floor. So, arm yourself now, and collect ammunition from the supply closet. Stand with your fellow coworkers nobly, and fill the air with whizzing rubber injury! The honor of your department demands it! Also, come on, Bob’s annoying and you totally want to bounce one off his glasses.

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Dan Seitz

Dan Seitz is an obsessive nerd living in New England. He lives in the Boston area with a fiancee, a dog, a cat, and far too many objects with processors.

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