As technology advances, there are important areas in which our most tireless scientists are constantly advancing the state of the art. Namely, goofy toys for putative adults, which make money. Like, for example, the Mega Stomp Battle.

Smash And Crash

The Mega Stomp Battle is a sister product for the Mega Stomp Panic, which syncs sound effects to your footsteps; you can sound like a Terminator clunking down the hall, a zombie shuffling towards what little brains are to be had at a meeting, or what have you. The Battle puts a small wand in your hand so you can add effects to your gestures.

Look, we said it was a goofy toy. We weren’t kidding.

Sound In Hand

It’s pretty simple to operate. The device comes with two pieces, a handheld wand and trigger, and a box you’ll clip to your belt. Just clip on the box, calibrate everything, and choose your sound bank; there are ten, all told, you can use to accompany your gestures. Then, all you need to do is pull the handy trigger on the wand or shake it to trigger specific sound effects. Even better, it’s tied to your motion in other ways, so that as you walk, you’ll get basic sound effects included in the sound bank.

Yes, ThinkGeek, which engineered this, was kind enough to not force you to buy two products to get the full Mega Stomp experience.

Cause A Panic


Obviously you won’t be wearing this all day, every day, but it’s designed to add a sense of verisimilitude to various costumes. After all, if a cardboard robot is walking down the hall, the whir of servos and clunk of metal make it a lot more convincing. And, needless to say, it makes fighting with foam swords a lot more fun; it’s available for $40 plus shipping.

Dan Seitz

Dan Seitz is an obsessive nerd living in New England. He lives in the Boston area with a fiancee, a dog, a cat, and far too many objects with processors.