When it comes to kitchen gadgets, you really need to focus on items that offer more than just one function. There’s very little, for example, that you can’t achieve in the kitchen with a good chef’s knife. But sometimes you have to consider tricking your friends as a separate purpose, and besides, you can always use a new cutting board. Meet the APPealing Cutting Board.
We could tell you about this cutting board, but instead you should just marvel at this achievement in marketing copy, which is blatantly aimed at your parents. This might be the best laugh you’ll have all day:
Serve up LOLZ (lots of laughs) at your next wine and cheese party with our APPealing glass cutting board. Made from tempered glass, this cheese board is perfect for serving cheese, crackers, and appetizers, and it is sure to please with its printed “apps” design. Our glass cutting board comes with a stainless steel cheese knife, complete with the “@” design on the handle.
…That’s almost majestic in how out of touch it is. We also like how they dance right up to the line of telling you that it’s an iPad, but can’t even bring themselves to say the word “Apple”, even though it looks, quite a bit, like they’ve ripped off all the icons from iOS 6; whoever makes this thing is totally getting sued once somebody clues in Apple’s legal department.
But, aside from that, it’s a fairly straightforward cutting board: Tempered glass means that it’s fairly strong, and it’s nice that it includes a carrying case and a cheese knife, although if you eat cheese and have a family that doesn’t quite “get” you, you’ve probably got a dozen cheese knives sitting in your drawer already.
This exceptionally cheesy board is available for $30. And hey, for that, you also get a carrying case!
Dan Seitz is an obsessive nerd living in New England. He lives in the Boston area with a fiancee, a dog, a cat, and far too many objects with processors.